#30daysofgratitude

With a new month upon us, I posted this message over on Instagram + Facebook.... join me there for daily gratitude (or keep your eyes peeled here for weekly re-caps!)... 

For the past two Novembers, I've given myself the quest of posting what I'm grateful for every day for thirty days. Since it's a great outlet for my creativity and I have so many good things in my life to appreciate, I shall once again partake in #30daysofgratitude. 🍁🍂 

Today's Gratitude :: this platform in which we get to "share". For me, sharing is a really important piece for healing and I love that I get to witness and hold space for you, in circles, over coffee, with your pictures, and your captions. Even though I have "an addiction to the scroll" and I'm working on finding balance in my relationship with social media, I enjoy getting little glimpses into your world, hearing your thoughts, sharing in your stories. I see you. I hear you. I'm grateful for you and thank you for seeing me. #day1 #creativityishealing#shareyourstory #alwaysanartist

Thank you for being here, dear readers!  I look forward to sharing with you more all month. xo!

Lessons from Nature :: Change

In the beginning of September, I went on a road trip to Jackson Hole and Yellowstone with my man.  It was such an amazing trip and I took millions of pictures trying to capture the beauty of the land, which really doesn't do it any justice of being there in the moment soaking it all in.  

I mean, take this picture of this gorgeous waterfall, for example: 

You can kind of get the gist of it from this snapshot, but in real life, it was so incredible I almost couldn't believe it was real.  I could've gazed at it all day long!  

One of the days on our trip, we took a bus tour of Yellowstone and it was so fascinating to hear all the details and history of the park.  The forest is literally built to survive forest fires the way one breed of trees' seeds only open up and grow under severe heat (like that of a fire).  When those lodgepole pines grow tall enough and provide enough shade, then the conditions are just perfect for the spruce and firs to grow and mature the forest.  

I learned that things in the park are always changing.  For several years there was a hot spring that looked black in contrast to the other more brilliant ocean blues of the others.  It was named Abyss and the tour guide loved having the contrast to explain to his group the difference between water temperature and other scientific deets.  THEN ONE YEAR, in the spring, when he arrived to this particular part of the tour, the hot spring had changed conditions and therefore the black color and contrast was gone!  

This is very much like our lives, yes?  

THINGS ARE ALWAYS CHANGING! 

For us human beings, change can be hard.  We want to be in control of our environments.  We can be creatures of habit who want to see the things we love stay the same.  

Similar to the species of trees, the animals, and the other natural features on our earth, we are adaptable.  We are resilient.  We are flexible.  We are creative.  And we can handle change.  

We may not like it.  We may not embrace it.  We may welcome it in with open arms!  

Wherever you are in your relationship to change, here are my two cents worth: find the tools and support you need to keep you going through times of change.

I've been experiencing a lot of change in the past couple months myself.  After coming back from our trip, we sold the place we were living, bought a house, packed up all our things, and moved.  I took on taking care of my grandma a couple times a week while also deciding to join on a team of practitioners at a new space.  Though the moments of waking up with anxiety, running on adrenaline, feeling exhausted, and fighting off getting sick, I've needed to consciously make an effort to include those things that make me feel grounded and aligned with my inner self.  Nature, breathwork, coffee dates with friends, long walks outside in the fresh fall air, journaling, hot showers, and SLEEP have been my key essentials in this current time of my life.

So dear ones, while change is inevitable, self-care and our essential tools can be so valuable.  And looking back after we've gone through our transitions, we may find the beauty in the journey, just like we see the changing beauty in nature. 

What are some of the things you lean on?  Share in the comments!     

Monday Musings :: Belong

One of my favorite places in NY was the Brooklyn Heights Promenade. When I'd get done with work, I'd grab a coffee or a snack and head down the few short blocks to watch the sunset over the Manhattan skyline. Sitting on the benches, I might journal or get lost in my thoughts as I watched tourists, families who lived in the neighborhood, dogs being walked, kids on scooters, nannies, photographers, people of all sorts milling around, exercising, or just taking in the view. Sometimes I'd pinch myself as I asked, "is this my real life?" I loved it.

I never got to see the actual Twin Towers from my favorite view, but I did see the beams of light in memorial every September 11th. I saw the flowers and notes that people would leave on the promenade in remembrance. And I would hear stories of how in the days following the tower falls, the New Yorker aloofness and boundaries on the subway came down momentarily as everyone sat together in grief and disbelief.

It seems that in tragedy and loss, whether it be through violence or a natural disaster or illness or other causes, there becomes a solidarity where the only thing that matters in the moments following is people. People that we love and strangers we hope and pray for. I love this quote I saw recently by Glennon Doyle,

"We will remember that we belong to each other. It will be terrible. And it will be beautiful."

It seems there are a lot of things to band together for these days, from protesting racism and policies, to rescues from flood and flame, to holding space for one another's healing, and I'm feeling grateful to belong to you in this intense and beautiful time.  Loving you! xo

**Join me in belonging to an amazing, heart-centered community on Friday, September 22nd for a Fall Equinox Breathwork.  Click here for details and to pre-register.  

Monday Mantra :: Love Anyway

Today is the anniversary of my dad's death.  Even though it's been 19 years since he passed, I still get surprised when little pockets of grief come up for me and I'm finding that no matter how much healing work I do around it, there's always a little bit more to be felt and explored.  

Sometimes I can feel his spirit close to me, which fills me with joy and peace.  Sometimes sadness.  Or sometimes both at the same time.  And sometimes, life goes by and I don't think of him at all for awhile.  

Over the years, his anniversary has brought up different mantras or messages and this year the thing I keep hearing over and over is: 

Love anyway.

This is something my priestess friend Meredith Edwards said one time in a moon circle back when I lived in Brooklyn, which resonated with me.  When Life hands you a big ol' dose of life, LOVE ANYWAY.  And that's what I'm feeling today.

I remember an experience I had several years ago where I received some news that I'd have to say goodbye to something I loved and I could literally feel my heart closing itself off.  It felt like there where hands compressing on my heart as sadness and stubborn anger tried to spew out.  I half think this was an automatic response from experiencing such great loss in my life before, because in the next second, I could feel myself choosing to brace my heart against this closing sensation so that it could stay open.  So that I could love anyway.  It was so interesting to have such a physical response within my body to a very poetic metaphor!

Loving is hard.  There are times when it feels easy and effortless and fun and beautiful and joy-filled.  And then when we have to say goodbye or let things and people go that we care so deeply about, it feels difficult, heart-wrenching, and painful.  

So as I was thinking about my dad this morning and his last few days, I was rocking this sweet little golden 10 month old baby girl, who happens to be my dad's great niece.  New life in my arms while reminiscing on a life already lived.  And I was reminded of the great cycle of life.  That we live each new birth and death cycle with each life we encounter, each decade of our lives, each year, each month, each moon cycle, each day, each breath.... that with death there always comes new life.  And with new life there always comes death.  

It becomes our mission, if we choose to accept it, to love anyway.  In spite of it all.  We can allow death, or life in general, to compress in on our hearts so that we close them off.  And maybe sometimes we need to close up shop for awhile and that's okay too.  But then, we get to choose to love anyway and allow our hearts to be broken.  Broken open for more love.  For more life.  

To quote another friend of mine, Anne Griffin:

"Life is too short not to love with your entire heart.  It's what makes life worth living."

This week, I invite you to take moments throughout your day to remind yourself to simply love anyway, no matter how hard that may be.  Today also happens to be a full moon and we can use the moon as a mirror for us, using it as inspiration to feel into our big FULL hearts that hold so much.  Know that I am loving you with mine.  xo  

THIS WEEK'S MANTRA :: LOVE ANYWAY.